"You've Been Cured!"

Those are the words I heard from my doctor this morning at my 36 week prenatal appointment. No, I haven't been cured of the heartburn, nausea, large belly, and annoying contractions, but I'm not hoping for relief from those symptoms for a few more weeks. What I have been cured from are all the inconsistencies, worries, and complications of this pregnancy. Yep, somehow over these last two months everything abnormal about this pregnancy has worked itself out, resulting in a baby that is growing right on target and amniotic fluid levels within the normal range.

I feel so grateful knowing I can finally sit back and relax for these last few weeks. I am planning on this birth being night and day difference from when Antalya was born. While I am in labor I can focus on nothing but the anticipation of holding my little girl - no last minute fluid reductions to lower my risk of an emergency c-section, no scheduled meetings with a social worker to make sure we can handle the stress of what is about to happen, no forms to sign in anticipation of our daughters admittance to the NICU, no fear that after all I do to bring her into the world she may not survive the upcoming surgery necessary for her to live. No, this time I will be prepared. I will be calm, under control, and relaxed. Rather than the needles and unfamiliar voices of the NICU staff, it will be my own arms and voice that first welcomes this little one into the world.



This picture was my first introduction to Antalya. Jason was allowed to go see her in the NICU before I was. He brought back the camera and I remembering him showing me on the camera screen this picture of our daughter. I thought she was so beautiful I couldn't hold back the tears. It will be incredible to see my child for the first time in 'real-life' rather than on the back of a camera.