Several months ago I found myself at a girl's night out with several people I had never met. Since there were so many friends of friends there, we went around the room, each person taking a few minutes to introduce themselves. After several minutes it was my turn. It went something like this: "Hi. My name is Sunny. I have a one year old daughter; she keeps me so busy that I really don't do much else." I was embarrassed that I could not think of anything that I enjoyed doing, any hobbies, or anything unique about myself. I could think of plenty of things that I once enjoyed doing before my life so drastically changed when Antalya was born.
That introduction has remained in the back of my mind all these months. Who am I? Do I have a life outside my duties at home? Am I setting aside time to develop my talents or discover new things about myself?
This summer I have taken up running. Each morning as I hit the pavement, I savor the time I have to reflect on life without the normal distractions. This morning I was thinking back to that evening several months ago, and realized that if asked today, my introduction would be very different. It would go something like this:
Hi. I'm Sunny. I love being a mother. I enjoy spending my daughter's nearly every waking moment loving her, teaching her, and encouraging her to learn new skills and be the best she can be. Through my experiences with my daughter I have learned that I have a passion for children with special needs. One day I want to have a career helping these special little ones. I love the look of accomplishment on their face when they are finally able to tackle a new task or learn a new skill. I believe they were sent to this world to teach us to love and become more Christ-like in our actions. They are little angels walking the earth with us, and I feel so blessed to have one of these angels living in my home.
I am a runner. I love hitting the road with my iPod, a Luna bar in one hand, and gatorade in the other. I love the feeling of just me and the road. I feel free. Free from self-doubt, free from the constraints and pressures of society, free from the stresses and anxiety of live. There is no one reminding me of all the things I need to get done that day, no one watching me or critizing the way I do things. During my morning run I feel like I can take on the world and come back truimphant.
I love to read. I am currently working on a list of classics that I picked up at our local library. I love that when I pick up good literature I am also learning about history, pyschology, math, science, religion, human nature, art, the list goes on and on. I learn so much about myself, and about who I want to become through the great fictional characters of the world.